I started the potty training right after we dropped his big sister off at preschool. I found his, "Once Upon a Potty" book, sat him down and read it to him, took off his diaper, put on his new P.J. Masks underwear. I showed him his potty seat (no way was I going to relive cleaning out a little kid potty), and showed him how to climb up and sit on it. I showed him the jar full of Pez (his favorite candy) and told him that he will get one once he pees in the potty. Then I gave him a juice carton and waited for the chaos to ensue.
The first few accidents were cute. They were little dribbles here and there, not like the huge puddles his sister used to make. After each accident, I'd run him to the potty to see if there was anymore. We'd wait a long time, maybe 20 minutes, then get off again. Then within 5 minutes of getting up, he'd have another accident. I tried to calculate in my head, "Does that mean if we had waited for 5 more minutes, he would have peed in the potty? Or did he not pee in the 20 minutes because he was sitting on the potty?" Mind games.
Mid-day, I was frustrated. We had successfully wet 7 underwear and 7 pants - all of them in a pile in the tub, and he had gone a couple times successfully in the morning but it seemed to be completely by accident. It was like this boy had no on/off switch. He would just go whenever there was a tablespoon of pee. So while it wasn't very much, it was near constant. The one thing he did learn, however, is he'd tell me, "pee pee!" as he was peeing. At times I tried to soothe myself by saying today was just a day to learn what pee pee felt like. At other times, I felt exhausted and darkly depressed.
After we ran out of underwear, I just let him run around naked. At this point, he was getting the process of climbing up on the potty and sitting down. In fact, he thought it was a game and would tell me he needed to go, then sit down for one second and say, "let's try tomorrow." He did this so many times, it was like the boy who cried, "wolf." At dinner, he did this enough that I said, "Okay, you go yourself if you really need to pee pee."
He went off to the bathroom himself, and because he was without pants, he didn't really need me. Two minutes later, he came back with a big grin on his face. "I did it! I went pee pee." Incredulous, I peeked into toilet and saw little pee droplets on the splash guard of the potty seat. It was a miracle! Of course I showered him with praises and Pez and with a new understanding of how this boy, MY BOY learned things. He needed lots of mechanical practice - the act of getting on the potty, and he needed it over and over again. He also needed some space as well. All the while I was watching him and coaching him turned into hilarious but ineffective breathing exercises. He succeeded when I was too tired to care and let him handle it on his own.
I know it's a long road to potty independence, but I'm hopeful. Today marks Day 2 in the potty training adventure, and he has gone pee in the potty 4 times (1 time was poop) – all of those he initiated the potty trip, and had 1 accident. Not too bad!
Who knows, tomorrow I may be eating my words...
Update: It's been one week since our potty adventures have started and I am very happy! He's had a couple accident free days (which included staying dry at night) and he is very consistent in telling me he needs to go to the bathroom. I think that is the biggest hurdle - getting him to tell me when he needs to go BEFOREHAND. The best part of it all, I don't have to clean up log-like poop anymore!
So in the end, was the theory that boys are harder to train a faulty one? I'm not sure, because I waited longer to start with Simon, but overall, for me it was a smoother experience. I understand potty training is different for everyone, boy, girl, 2 or 3 or 4 or more. I'm just glad I didn't give up that first day, or the next, or the next.
Read about my experience potty training a girl. Part 1. Part 2. Part 3.
